I watched “Here Comes Honey BooBoo” last night. If you don’t know who Honey BooBoo is, well, she is quite famous from her appearances as the wildly energetic and outrageous contestant on “Toddlers & Tiaras”. She and her Mom have been on Dr. Drew and Anderson Cooper’s daytime talk show to talk about the good, the bad and the ugly side of children’s pageants, particularly regarding Honey’s – her real name is Alana – habit of drinking go-go juice and ingesting enormous amounts of pixie sticks, both of which are laden with sugar and meant to keep up her level of hyper activity.
Now that she has her own spinoff, we’ve met Honey’s entire family. There’s Mama, Dad, known as Sugar Bear and the girl’s three older sisters, Pumpkin, Chickadee and Chubbette. They have real names, too, but I couldn’t keep track of them. I also had a bit of a problem understanding their accents, so I was glad that TLC provided subtitles for some of their conversations. I’ve lived in the South for a few years now, and I’ve been told that I have a Yankee accent and talk too fast, so I guess it goes both ways – some things are lost in translation.
There have been a few programs featuring rednecks as of late. Aside from Honey BooBoo’s show, I’ve also seen “My Big Redneck Wedding” and “My Big Redneck Vacation”. I have to admit, they make me laugh – not at them but with them. They are what they are and don’t make any excuses for the way they live, speak, play or work. They don’t have to because they’re not doing anything but making their way in the world without hurting anyone else on their journeys. If anything, they serve as the perfect foils for those very classy, high society ladies we watch every week on Bravo’s Real Housewives. That’s how I watched Honey BooBoo and her family – just to compare their reality and the stark contrast of what Bravo tries to pass off as reality.
We watch the Housewives attend a lot of parties, lunches and dinners, all of which begin or end in someone or several someones getting drunk and starting some ridiculous argument because they were offended, or holding a grudge about offenses with a shelf life of forever. Sugar Bear brought home dinner for his family, a deer found at the side of the road. They named the deceased animal Darlene, then sat down to eat. None of them cared about how good any particular wine was, in fact, they just seemed happy to have a meal, together, as a family. Sugar bear works seven days a week to provide for his family. Mama is an extreme couponer, who makes weekly trips to an auction to bid on cases of food with questionable expiration dates. When the children act out, Mama reels them back in and they listen to her. Sugar Bear brought home a teacup pig, Glitzy, as a pet for Honey BooBoo. The family set up a pack and play for the little one, and Honey was as happy as Lisa is with Giggy or Adrienne is with Jackpot. Glitzy was even treated to a pedicure, complete with polish, and adorned with one of Honey’s pageant crowns.
The family also goes to outings together. Last night they went to the Redneck Olympics, annual events held in many locales in the South. There is one held here in Aiken every year and it brings out quite a crowd. The events include things like bobbing for pigs’ feet, belly flopping into mudpits and competitions for the largest beer belly. Thankfully, Speedos are not the attire of choice, but it can make for some not so clean fun. It may not be as glamorous as a dinner at Le Cirque, but, on a happier note, Aviva, LuAnn and Ramona will never make an appearance, either. There have been times when some disagreements have occurred, but they’re quickly resolved, sometimes with fists, but they always end with a handshake. No one is going home still angry about the issue. It’s over and it’s all good. I can’t say that I’ve ever heard anyone call someone a c&%#, or anything even close, particularly from a man about a woman, and certainly never around children. I’m still getting used to being greeted by perfect strangers who tip their heads and call you Ma’am when they pass you on the street.
It’s easy to make fun of rednecks, to pass judgment and think we have them all figured out based on how they look or speak. That type of preconceived notion is a two-way street, as some Southerners also have their own ideas about people from the North, so it’s been a learning experience for me, too. Tolerance and a healthy sense of humor have gone a long way in bridging the gap between my roots and my new life. I’ve been watching the Housewives and their significant others for a few years now. They live in beautiful homes, whether they can afford them or not. They have designer clothes and shoes. Botox, breast enhancements and spa treatments are the norm. They’re beautiful to look at but very ugly when they speak. More often than not, they are living lifestyles that aren’t really real. We know it and we discuss them all the time. We also agree, for the most part, that we don’t envy what they have, how they spend their time or who they call their friends. I don’t envy the people who appear on any of the redneck reality shows either, but I do know that they’re not faking anything. From what I’ve seen, they love and like each other, too. If forced to choose, and having experienced life on both sides of the Mason-Dixon line, I think my decision of which group I’d prefer to be around would be an easy one. Mama and Sugar Bear will never be doing a step and repeat at a red carpet event, but they’re doing just fine. They’re a real family, flaws and all.
Awesome blog!!!! Just because someone does not act the same as we do…. Does not make them wrong. We need more Tolerance and kindness in the world!
Hi TEB2350, Thank you for stopping by. It’s not easy to see each other for what’s really there, but we could move mountains with just a little effort. 🙂
That was fun to read – love your insights. But gotta tell you, my Mom lives outside a small TX town and some of her neighbors are a little….odd and have some of the strangest beliefs and attitudes, but they are definitely REAL. The HWs live in a fantasy world they want to believe is real, but I actually think they live on the outskirts of the real world and seem to be happy there. So can’t help but wonder why they fight and attack and complain and damage relationships the way they do?? So much for “having it all”, as they think they do.
We had to adjust to the idea that our beliefs and attitudes were just as alien to our new neighbors as theirs were to us. I guess “having it all” really does depend on perspective. 😉
I kind of wish they hadn’t agreed to do reality TV. I know it’s going to help them financially, but their lives will never be the same and some of the changes won’t be for the better. Hopefully they will stay the same grounded happy family they seem to be.
Whatever money they receive will go a long way for this family, but yes, I would hate to see someone take advantage of them. I hope someone has their backs because I don’t think they’re worldly enough to handle the TV business on their own.
I haven’t seen this show. I enjoyed your blog about it immensely and I will take a look at the show. I know that Southern Florida isn’t really the South, after all….
During the first part of this year I saw a few episodes of The Snake Man of Appalachia. It was on the Discovery Channel. I was mesmerized by Vern and his family as well as their way of life. I wonder how they are doing now that the show has seemingly ended?
Vern and his wife seemed to have what must be the universal desire for most in this life: a better way of life for their next generation. How one defines “a better way of life” is what I find fascinating and far less universal.
I was ready to do more than a little eye-rolling and, watching some of this episode I did. I don’t think I’ll be setting my DVR to record the series, but it satisfied my curiosity. I just figured that if I could watch and write about the HW’s, well, what the hell, watching Honey BooBoo and her family couldn’t be much worse. In fact, I think if Honey BooBoo, as the holder of many crowns and titles, could meet Countess LuLu, she’d tell her “You think you’re all that and a cracker, too. Well, you ain’t”. 😉
I imagine Honey BooBoo will eventually wear more tasteful jewelry, too. You’re allowed to wear a tiara after winning a pageant….It seems the tiara LuAnn wears is imaginary, much like the value of her title in the United States.
Speaking of big jewelry.
Oh my, bb, Those look like they would really, really hurt. I love Beyonce, but even LuLu might find them too much. 😦