Of all of the Housewives’ franchises, this is the hardest one to watch.  A while back I wrote that what made the cast from Franklin Lakes different from all of the other cities was the fact that real families are involved.  If you feel at all they way I do, that perhaps you’re more vested in these people, maybe because we all, at some time, have lived through some of the very same problems.  Some of us have been able to call a truce, work out our differences and remember that have we more to lose by not remedying the situation.   I can’t explain it any better than that – there is a little bit of all of us in the Gorgas, the Giudices, the Manzos and the Lauritas.

I’ve also said that I don’t know when or how these families’ problems began, and, now, I don’t think they even know anymore.  Their arguments and differences have begun to define them.  What may once have been foolish and petty spats have now become a way of life for all of them.  They don’t argue over what is really wrong, because I don’t know if they can recall what those things were.  Now, and possibly forever, they want only to be right, to hear apologies what each of them consider are sins against each other.  There has to be a winner and a loser, and that’s just not going to happen.

Baby Joey and Teresa could make things right between them if they knew how to.  Joey said that his parents would never accept either of their children going to therapy.  He said that his parents were old school, and he’s right.  Momma and, more importantly, Poppa Gorga would view outside help from a professional as a sign of weakness.   He also said that his parents’ generation would simply stop talking to another family member, for decades before anyone not related to them would be allowed to intervene.  This is exactly what happened between Kathy’s mother and her brother, Joey and Teresa’s dad.  That decades long feud was over a paltry sum of money.  What is happening between these siblings is much deeper, more painful and more damaging.

I would like to believe differently, but I don’t think they are ever going to repair their relationship.  To do so would mean that they would have to confront each of their respective spouses and tell them that their criticism isn’t welcome and certainly isn’t helping.  I don’t think that any of us who have watched these two people and their spouses interact are going to see that any time soon, if at all.   Teresa will never be able to speak to her husband with the right words or tone that could ever reach him.  He believes that he has it all figured out, he is right and his wife should just shut up.

Joey, on the other hand, keeps pouring gasoline on this inferno.  He carries stories about his sister all over New Jersey.  I don’t know why exactly, unless he wants allies in this war, and even worse, he believes that he is just as right as Juicy.   He and his wife have called his sister names, shunned her at family events and shared family problems with everyone within earshot.  Passing on this information and befriending Caroline Manzo may be the very thing that seals all of their fates.  She too, enjoys fanning the flames in her own desire to be right and righteous.  She has said that Teresa won’t be happy until Joey and Melissa are divorced.  I think Caroline won’t be happy until she, and her cohorts, see divorce papers at the Giudice house.

I’m not giving Teresa a pass in any of this.  She has said and done things to all of them which have left a mark.  When she argues with her her brother or Melissa, she, all too often, goes off on tangents, making circular and irrelevant counter arguments.   She’ll avoid the crux of a problem by latching onto words and going in for the kill, almost as if deflecting away from what really is hurting her.

This just gets worse and worse with each week’s episodes.  There is no chance in Hell that all of their children aren’t already paying the price for their parents’ constant battles.  We see it in Gia and Milania – in different ways, but they’re still pleading for a sign that there may be some peace among them.  The younger Gorga and Giudice kids aren’t oblivious, either.  Tension is felt at very young ages, and who knows how they will handle this ongoing disruption as they get older.  Bear with me if I’m repeating myself, but there is nothing in a contract with Bravo that is worth any of this – no money, no singing career, no cookbooks, and no, Caroline, not even a Jaguar – that’s going to compensate for what is being thrown away.

National Police Week

If I could take a little moment on a personal subject, I’d just like to say that this is National Police Week.  Most of you know what that means to me, so if you’d just take a little bit of time to reflect on those who watch over you and watch out for you 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, I’d appreciate it.  Some of them haven’t always made it home to their families at the end of their shifts.

Empress