Celebrity Apprentice – What a B word

Hello Friends. It’s a long one for a first at this site. The future ones will not be as long. One of the shows I agreed to blog, recap, or review here is Celebrity Apprentice. I’ll present it, and you can decide which of those categories it fits into. To give you a little background of where I stand with these people.  Like Teresa, Arsinio, Clay, and Dayana. Penn is okay too but I sometimes get a strange vibe from him though I don’t quite know what it is. That leaves the two remaining contestants. Lisa Lamanelli or as my YT recapper friend has called her, Jabba The Hut. We’ll just use JTH for short and it’ll be understood that I’m talking about Lisa. The other, Aubrey O’day. Ummm, this is one narcissistic beyotch. Some of you may be familiar with her from her days on MTV’s Making The Band when she was part of the girl group, Danity Kane at Bad Boy Records. She was fired from that group by P-Diddy (What the hell is a P Diddy anyway?). She was fired for her mouth, her outward sluttiness (as Diddy saw it), and general better than everyone else attitude. Diddy wanted a girl group that young tween girls could look up to and he didn’t feel that she was portraying the proper image for that demographic. Anyway- Here she is on Celebrity Apprentice.

In past weeks, regardless of what teams they’ve been on, both AO and JTH have been little more than Tyrants IMO. They are nice and team player like when it suits them but make no mistake about it, these two are there strictly for themselves. You could say that everyone else is as well but when it takes a team to win a task, their attitudes don’t do well to build team unity. Of course, each player must be careful not to be seen as the weak link or the one working against the project manager. As of a few weeks ago, the women could barely pull out a win and in fact, had lost 5 of the 7 tasks I think it was. It was either AO or JTH who came up with the ideas but of course it was never their fault when they lost. I mean, After all, How can one screw with Perfection personified? As if the hand of some deity has touched these two and made them infallible. We then see a lot of fake waterworks from these two as they try to turn on the faucet but it’s Sahara City. Kind of like a BH Housewife we know. Trump decided to mix the teams and see how it flew. He sent Penn and Dee Snyder over to the women’s team and Teresa and Aubrey to the men’s team. The task at the time was to put on a presentation for Walgreens. Arsinio was PM for his team, with Aubrey a part of it. Now, She has always been a take charge kind of person. Admirable in a project manager but not in a ‘team player’. She and Lisa claim they are the only ones on either team capable of coming up with an idea or rather a Good idea. Long story short, Aubrey managed to anger Arsinio even though his team won with all of her ME and I BS. For my money, Arsinio later gave us one of the best CA Rants EVER, In My Opinion. Needless to say that the two of them don’t get along anymore. Fast forward to this most recent episode and we’ll get on with it.

The players are taken to Trump’s gawdy penthouse in Trump tower to receive their next assignment. Abrey thinks it reminds her of Willie Wonka’s chocolate factory except with gold instead of chocolate. Whatever (where’s the eye roll smiley?). The task this week is to come up with a Macy’s ad campaign for Trumps new fragrance, Success By Trump. The PMs are Aubry for team Unanimous (with Arsinio and Teresa) and Clay for team Forte (Lisa, Penn, Dayana). The prize is the usual $20k but Trump says if he LOVES the winning teams’ product, he’ll increase that to $100k. We see a lot of Arsinio talking heads in this episode when it comes to Abrey being project manager. The teams go to their war rooms and begin hatching plans. Rather, Forte begins to put together a plan and Aubrey begins to put together a plan. I’ll admit that if she didn’t act like such a self righteous bitch, I would admire her in a way. She’s no idiot. In fact, Even Arsinio says of the two women he’s working with, Aubrey is near genius (Huh?) while Teresa is near not. Eluding to, I guess, she’s a little slow on the uptake sometimes. We know that, I know that, but I still like Teresa. Sometimes that and her Teresa-isms part of her charm to me. Don’t ask me why though. I don’t think anyone can deny that she’s a hard worker. Anyway. The executives are the main marketing person for Macy’s and Trump’s lead person for branding. I’m sorry but I couldn’t catch their names. The eyes and ears this week are Eric Trump and Donald’s ball buster, George Ross. This guy doesn’t blow smoke up anyone’s ass nor does he allow anyone to blow smoke up his. George has been some part of All of the Apprentice shows.

In the Forte room, they are doing their brainstorming to come up with ideas for slogan and how to present the product on an in store display at Macy’s. Penn throws out the slogan “You Earned It”. By consensus, the team agrees that’s what they will use. In reality though, Clay says that once Penn comes up with an idea and pushes it out there, He pushes and pushes until that’s the way they are going. Dayana thinks that since they are trying to appeal to men, sex sells basically so a scantily clad woman is in order with respect to Penn’s next idea. That is to have Dayana in a picture of a torso, basically that has one of Trump’s shirt and tie on, while holding the cologne bottle and Dayana snuggling the man’s chest. The idea of the scantily clad woman gets shot down though.

Over at Unanimous, they are sloganing, Aubrey and Teresa throw out some ideas and Aubrey eventually mentions “Trust your instincts”. Within seconds, Arsinio points out something he’s found on the net. It looks like a YT video where Donald is saying, “Trust your instincts”. Arsinio notes in his TH that Aubrey will try and claim that she came up with the quote. Here’s what I think. She saw it before she began the show or just before this task or may have even read it off of the internet During the task. It’s just too coincidental for me.

Both teams decide that a skyline type arrangement is the way to go with the store display. Unanimous will feature smell sticks, the different bottles of cologne, pamphlets that describe the product, and a silhouette of a man looking up at the buildings. Aubrey decides to ask Eric Trump to pose for the photo they will create the silhouette from. He agrees and shows up during their construction phase, and Aubrey does all sorts of ass kissing and bragging about how she’s done Everything, She had sent Arsinio and Teresa to the store to get some fabric to use on the display. Instead of painting the display, the set designer builder guy suggests Vinyl covering to match the colors on the bottles. That’s what she sent Teresa and Arsinio to get stating in her TH, she doesn’t want to ‘babysit’ and they are basically useless anyway. On the other side of the wall, Clay is having trouble deciding how he wants to execute everything. He says he can look at a sheet of music and hear in his mind how it will sound. However, he cannot look at a drawing of a physical object and see what the final product will be. Clay’s team meets with the male model that will be the torso backdrop for Dayana’s photo. Clay is in lust, ’nuff said. Lisa sneaks over to see what Aubrey’s team is doing because she’s nervous about competing with her. Surprisingly, Lisa isn’t giving Dayana any shit. Seems that when Dayana’s beauty can be used to Lisa’s advantage, she puts the green eyed monster away. Back at Unanimous, Teresa and Arsinio arrive back and Teresa is tasked with painting the edges of the boards that will make the cityscape. In her dress clothes, complete with her 4 inch pumps. Arsinio notes how crazy it is to see Teresa running around in her pumps, stating she could probably do a 100 yard dash in them.

Presentation time. Before the executives come in, George Ross pays a visit to Unanimous to view the finished product. Aubrey tries to explain that she thinks she has it in the bag and explains the elements of the display. He picks every part of it apart and tells her not to be so cocky thinking she’s run away with it, in so many words. She presents to the execs and it’s a group effort. After Aubrey finishes her shpeel trying to slip some cutesie comments here and there (I find her neither cute or funny), She hands it off to Arsinio with the statement ‘last time I checked, he was a man’. Please. He wants to know when she did the Penis inspections. Did I say she is a beyotch on wheels? If not, I’m saying it now. Arsinio gives his part of the presentation and then hands it off to Teresa. The execs seem impressed. For team Forte, Clay is the only one who speaks. Basically he says, “here you go, here’s your display”, The execs say, “okay, continue”…. Clay was stuck because that’s all he had. He winged it going through the elements of the display. The execs discuss their likes and dislikes about each but come down to a 50/50 split on each. There were elements they liked about each and other stuff they hated.

Board Room Time… Naturally as usual, each PM thinks they are going to win and their teams were great. Aubrey and Arsinio go a couple light rounds about who came up with the slogan. Aubrey does a lot of ass kissing as usual and it doesn’t take her long to take full credit for everything. Trump goes as far as to call that insulting. He says to Teresa that she’s a hard worker and a nice woman but will strike if cornered. Teresa agrees. Trump says it’s his wife that told him that. Clay thinks he’s won, Lisa thinks Dayana was fantastic (Huh?). The teams examine each others presentations and no one hates them. Here’s what the execs thought.

Forte- Hated the slogan, loved the photo but thought it was too large. Also, the branding was too disconnected.

Unanimous- Hated the Eric Trump silhouette because it was out of place and they didn’t get it. Liked the presentation, the smell sticks, the pamphlets, and the branding.

Before Trump announces the winner he states he didn’t love either one but there were elements about each he thought were good. He decides no one will get the $100k but instead he will divide it up. Winning PM gets $40K and EACH team member gets $10k each for their charity. Unanimous Wins.Now here is what makes Aubrey such a bitch on wheels to me. Instead of being glad she won, got money for her charity ($50k), claiming she had a runaway project and should have gotten the $100k. Have I mentioned what I think of this raging B?

Now it’s time for Clay to decide who to bring back. After much talk and speaking of Consensus, Trump says Consensus, BS in so many words, pick two. In the end, Dayana makes her 6th trip to the board room and Penn makes a visit as well. Without dragging this out any longer, We won’t be seeing Penn on the show anymore, it was his slogan the execs hated so much he is the one who is fired. Dayana escapes elimination once again. I’m sure Jabba The Hut will be pleased with that come next week. Til then folks,

In MY opinion…. Clay should have won this task. I didn’t like Aubrey’s display at all, George was correct in his critique of it.



About MelTheHound

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4 Responses to Celebrity Apprentice – What a B word

  1. “What the hell is a P Diddy anyway?” LOL! Sundays are a handful for writing assignments. Loved what you wrote, and though I haven’t watched CA yet – it’s waiting on that little DVR thing – your recap is terrific, and your work is always appreciated.

  2. baronessbeachcomber says:

    Sorry, MTH, can’t agree with you that Clay’s team should have won. His presentation pretty much sucked and at least Aubrey’s team had take aways. Neither teams’ displays were very good, IMO.

    • melthehound says:

      The main reason Clay’s team lost is because of the slogan, You’ve Earned It. I agree that both displays were less than great and Clay should have been better prepared with the presentation. There was no reason for him to do so poorly against Aubrey on the presentation part of it except she loves to talk about herself. However, I didn’t think the slogan that Penn came up with was offensive. That’s why I say I think they should have won.

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