Bethenny and her friend, Hoda Kotb, go out to lunch and start talking about Hoda’s recent birthday trip to Paris with her boyfriend. During their conversation, the waiter comes to their table and starts describing the specials of the day, which include oysters from Puget Sound. His description of the poor shellfish somehow remind Bethenny of her own “wazoo”. I know that oysters are considered an aphrodisiac, but that isn’t quite the effect I thought they were suppose to have.
The two continue their talk, which leads into more comments, by Bethenny, about Bethenny’s sex life – or lack of one. She knows that Hoda is having the time of her life, while she just doesn’t seem to be enjoying some of the same pleasures. Perhaps I should take back my comment from last week about Jason’s cobwebs and the joys of doing a little dusting.
Back at her apartment, Bethenny has her friend, Teri, over and the two are talking about Bethenny’s sex life – oh and babies. Teri is telling her how she should have another baby, but we have heard how that happens, and that’s not happening. Teri also mentions that, if for no other reason, Bethenny should have a second child that might look more like her, because she thinks that Bryn has all of Jason’s good looks. Well, that went well.
Jason arrives home and is a little annoyed about the fact that the apartment is still full of people who are still working. He decides to announce the “no work after 6PM” rule. The three of them start talking about a trip to Spain that Jason and Bethenny have been planning but has yet to come any closer than the discussion stage. Jason mentions that he has been to Barcelona already. This comes as a complete surprise to Bethenny who wants to know how, why and with whom did that happen. Jason says that it was a year before they met and that it was with some other guys. Bethenny isn’t buying it and tells her husband that a bunch of guys in Spain sounds kind of gay. Jason just gives up and gets up, telling us that he will never tell her the real story because he can’t get a word in edgewise.
Bethenny then meets up with her foodie friend, Nick, and they are off to do a Falafel crawl. Nick is interrogated about his sex life during the entire trip, with Bethenny telling him that a little personal grooming, ok, maybe, deforestation, might help him. Nick says that he would hope that someone likes him for being interesting and making good conversation. In between restaurants and food trucks, the two go into a salon, where first Bethenny, then Nick, have their eyebrows threaded. Nick is in obvious pain, and I have to say that the job was a lot more work than is normally required, but he has lost the unibrow look.
Bethenny is going for a girls’ weekend in Montauk and needs Julie to tell her to only fill the car’s tank with diesel. She also tells Bethenny how to start and shift the car with only the buttons on the Mercedes. Bethenny is off, with, Dawa, Bryn in a car seat in the back and Cookie on her lap. OK, I’m sorry, but if Bethenny insists on driving around with her dog on her lap, well, let’s just hope the airbag never deploys. Cookie and her mistress are in for a world of hurt.
In Montauk, Bethenny meets up with a few of her friends and their children, and, for their first night, she hosts a clambake at the Montauk Yacht Club. There is a children’s menu as well as lobster, clams and other items I won’t list because I’m resisting driving back to New England for seafood. Bethenny finds herself sitting among the kids and Bryn utters her first sentence – “I’m the baby”. I had to hand it to Bethenny because the very first thing she thought of, after being brought to tears by the moment, was that she needed to call Jason and then make an entry in Bryn’s baby book.
The women had some moments of silliness as they tried to operate a paddle boat. Most of the group has left, but Bethenny and two of her friends go out to a local restaurant called The Sloppy Tuna. Bethenny orders a vagina table for three in honor of ladies’ night and the drinking begins. The three make a toast to their girly pieces and raise their glasses to the deadliest snatch. Some little guy in a superhero costume comes over and says that he knows Bethenny from somewhere. It finally comes to him who she is, and happily announces that she is Benjamin Franklin.
That encounter send the three in search of someplace a little less rough and they go to a different bar. Bethenny talks about her need for friends that she can trust. She goes on to tell the others how she felt that her stepfather, John, was good to her and that he deserved to be called father. However, she also admits that she has made no attempt to contact him, despite her feelings for and about him. She is afraid for her daughter, and hopes that Bryn ends up sweet and soft, not a hardened survivor, like herself.
Lastly, Bethenny meets with Dr. Amador and they talk about the roles of Bethenny’s father and stepfather. Dr. Amador, despite several interruptions by his patient, makes the point that Bobby Frankel was the first love of Bethenny’s life and remains so, despite her anger and resentment. He tells her that her love and life doesn’t need to be a matter of Bobby versus John, but that each man can have a place in her heart.
Dr. Amador also asks her to imagine that another 14 year old girl is there, on the couch, and what advice would she give that girl, given similar backgrounds. Bethenny says that she would probably be curious about a number of things, including why a father would abandon a child. Dr. Amador tells Bethenny that she was able to show some empathy for this imagined girl’s situation and confusion. Bethenny is still, deep down, 14.